To join your ark server:
On your steam client click on view then click on servers.
Next you'll want to click on the servers tab.
At the bottom you will see a button that lets you add an IP to your favorites, click it.
Paste in the query ip.
Click find games at this address.
It should find your server, then just click the add to favorites button.
Now it should appear in ark under the "Favorites" tab on the server screen.